


Septième Semaine

by impatient14



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Apologies, Boy Squad, Coming Out, Fix It, Friendship, Girl Squad - Freeform, Grand Gestures, M/M, Reunion, Tags Are Hard, bjs as an artform, emotionally charged text exchages, gay slur, rating goes to mature at end of chapter 8
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-07 15:34:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 7,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17963258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impatient14/pseuds/impatient14
Summary: Week Seven of Skam France.Based off of OG and including a fixit for Yann's response to Lucas' coming out.





	1. Samedi 00:16

The light from the television coats the room in blue, but Lucas isn’t really watching. His eyes are glassy, his expression vacant. He’s too numb for anything else. The flat isn’t empty, but Lucas is alone. A piece of him waits for Manon to emerge from her room and join him in quiet despair once more, but Lucas can hear her speaking faintly through the walls. She’s on the phone with one of her friends.

His phone vibrates on the table, but Lucas just stares at it, wills his phone to disappear. It doesn’t, and thirty seconds later it’s vibrating again. With a sigh, Lucas reaches for it.

**_Yann_ ** _Can we talk?_  
**_Yann_ ** _I’m outside_

Lucas stares at his phone’s screen for a full minute before he sits up. His heart thuds painfully in his chest, a feeling he’s become far too familiar with lately. It’s not the pleasant kind of heart rush. It’s an ache, a slow crushing sensation that threatens to destroy him.

His phone vibrates in his hand.

**_Yann_ ** _Please?_

Lucas takes a deep breath, and then rises from the couch. He pulls on his hooded sweatshirt and slips on a pair of shoes by the door. They’re Mika’s, but Lucas doesn’t care. The walk down to meet his best friend is treacherous, and there’s something about wearing Mika’s shoes that gives him strength.

When he opens the door to the outside, and the cold assaults his cheeks, Lucas tries not to show his discomfort. Yann is standing on the sidewalk waiting for him, looking a thousand different ways, and Lucas has to steel himself for whatever awaits him. He doesn’t speak. He’s said all he needs to say. The rest is up to Yann.

Yann swallows hard, takes in Lucas’ trepidation and raises his hands in an aborted gesture that Lucas can’t characterize.

“I fucked up,” Yann tells him simply. “I know…” He sighs and shrugs his shoulders like it’s all he knows to do. “I know I fucked this up.”

Lucas doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t dare hope for anything anymore.

“I was so angry about everyone else knowing about what was going on with you before I did, I didn’t even think-“ Yann cuts himself off, shakes his head. “I can’t say I’m not pissed everyone knew before me. I’m your best friend Lucas. You’re my brother. And to think you didn’t trust me with this…it hurt.” He pauses, waits for Lucas to say something, but Lucas refuses. He’s already given everything away.

“But I was wrong to walk away from you like that,” Yann continues. The weight on Lucas’ heart begins to lift. “To let you think that I care about who you’ve fallen in love with.” He steps closer and Lucas can’t help but step back. “Lucas, I got you. I’m with you. You love Eliott? Okay. I’m sorry it’s such a shitty situation with him and his girl, but I got your back, man.”

Lucas doesn’t know if he’s smiling. It’s been too long since he’s really meant it, but he hopes he is. He hopes he’s smiling as Yann slowly closes the distance between them and pulls Lucas into a crushing hug. Lucas lets himself be hugged, let’s himself melt into the comfort that was denied to him just a few hours ago. Yann pats the back of his head as he pulls away, holding on as he looks down at Lucas.

“I want to be here for you, man, but I can’t do that if you keep hiding stuff from me. Okay?”

This time, Lucas knows he’s smiling. It’s faint, a whisper of a feeling, but he can feel it stretch his lips. The ache recedes.

“Yeah, okay.” Lucas nods, looks down at his feet as they step back from their hug. “Thanks.”

Yann nods, smiles back at him. There’s a slight awkwardness between them now, something that might linger if one of them doesn’t put a stop to it. Yann does.

“And uh, Eliott,” Yann says with a smirk. “He’s uh, a good choice I think.”

Lucas’ eyebrows raise in surprise. “What?”

“You know,” Yann continues with an uncomfortable laugh. “He’s pretty hot, no?”

Lucas’ laugh is equally uncomfortable, but pleased nonetheless. “I mean, yeah…”

“Well,” Yann replies with a shrug, still smiling. “What are you going to do about it?”

“I don’t know,” Lucas replies with a sigh. He looks down at his shoes again, and then back up to follow a taxi as it flies down the road. “He’s all over the place. I don’t know what’s in his head.”

“Maybe you should talk to him.”

Lucas nods. “Maybe.” He sighs again, puts his hands in his pocket as he leans against the wall of his flat’s building. “He left me a drawing in my pocket today. It said I was his destiny.” He tries to play it off like a joke, like he thinks the idea is stupid, but by the way Yann looks at him, Lucas is unsuccessful.

“His destiny?” Yann echoes quietly, coming to stand beside him. He lets out a low whistle as he leans back on the wall. They look out at the street together. “That sounds like something a guy with a girlfriend shouldn’t be saying.”

“Nothing I can really do about it,” Lucas replies, annoyed.

“I don’t know, man,” Yann replies carefully. “You’re all messed up about this. You’ve got to figure out where you stand.”

Lucas doesn’t know how to reply. It’s true. He’s so messed up. Nothing makes sense anymore.

Except this. Except this moment with this best friend where Lucas is reminded that he’s not alone. He has a brother to rely on. Yann isn’t perfect, he made a mistake, but he’s here now, making up for it. Lucas is grateful.

“You know what I think?” Yann asks, his smile playful. Lucas grins up at him and shakes his head. “Eliott needs to breakup with his girlfriend.”

Lucas keeps smiling.


	2. Dimanche 10:36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucas texts Eliott. Mika gets an apology.

Lucas wakes to loud whispers and the sound of metal on metal. It only takes him a moment to realize that Manon is in the kitchen again, baking another feast, and Mika is keeping her company. He can’t tell what they’re discussing, but it sounds like something Lucas doesn’t want to be involved in. 

He turns over on the couch and reaches for his phone, unplugging it from the charger. No new messages. He isn’t sure why he thought Eliott might text him. Maybe hope is more like it. Lucas had hoped Eliott would text him after leaving the drawing in his pocket, something that might signify what it really means, but he’s heard nothing. 

Lucas stares at his phone a little while, listening to Manon and Mika’s quiet debate as he has an internal one of his own. Yann suggested Lucas talk to Eliott, confront him about what it is he wants from Lucas. So far, Lucas hasn’t been afraid to meet any of Eliott’s challenges. He doesn’t see why he should start now.

Opening their text thread Lucas begins to type.

**_Lucas:_ ** _Thank you for the drawing. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with it though_

He doesn’t hit send. He stares at the message until he’s sighing with frustration. He isn’t sure what Eliott is trying to tell him, but Lucas is hesitant to push him too fast again. Lucas wants to play this as cool as possible. 

**_Lucas:_ ** _Thank you for the drawing._

He hits send then lets the phone drop to his chest. Lucas stares up at the ceiling until Manon peeks her head out from the kitchen. She’s whisking something in a large metal bowl and ignoring the crude gestures Mika is performing behind her.

“Good morning,” she tells him. “Hope we didn’t wake you.”

Lucas offers her a tiny shake of his head and a timid smile. She looks a little better today. Lucas can relate. Things may still be terrible, but at least he knows his best friend is on his side, and he knows Manon is too. Lucas’ eyes shift to Mika behind her, who is pantomiming a blowjob. Lucas makes a disgusted face, then quickly tries to conceal it, but Mika sees. He stops his performance, and they share an uncomfortable look, before Mika disappears back into the kitchen. 

Lucas still hasn’t apologized for what he said to him about being gay. He wants to, he just isn’t sure how. With his experience with Yann the other day, even as benign as it was compared to some people’s trauma, Lucas thinks he understands a little more about where Mika is coming from.

He clears his throat as he sits up. “What are you making?” he asks Manon.

“Crêpes,” she tells him with a grin. “They’ll be ready in a little bit. Coffee?”

Lucas nods, but hesitates before standing. He stares longingly at his phone, wills it to vibrate with a response from Eliott, but he’s smart enough not to hold out hope. This is the guy who stood Lucas up just last week, the guy who kissed him in the rain then held him in his arms as he told Lucas he was the only person he could see. The guy who broke it off just as quickly as it started. Eliott unreliable, but Lucas can’t help but hope.

He sighs as he releases that hope into the ether and joins Manon and Mika in the kitchen. He leaves his phone in the living room. There’s no point in bringing it along.

Mika is holding a cup of coffee close to his face, his eyes on Lucas as he enters. There’s tension in the air, tension that wraps around Lucas as he reaches for a mug and pours himself a cup of coffee. His first sip is heavy and full of everything that’s been left unsaid. He hates it. 

Lucas lets out a loud sigh, and then turns to Mika.

“Can I talk to you?”

Mika shrugs one shoulder. “You’re talking now. Seems like you know how.” His gaze falls to Manon. “Did you know he struggled with such a thing?”

Manon glares at him. “Mika.” She shakes her head subtly, reprimanding Mika’s rudeness. Lucas is grateful, but he’d rather deal with Mika on his own. He turns to her and her bowl of crêpe batter.

“Do you think you could give us a moment?”

Manon nods easily, obviously interested, but respectful to Lucas’ request. “Sure. I’ll go see if I can convince Lisa to get up.”

He watches her leave, her crêpe batter and whisk abandoned on the counter. He stares at it until Mika sighs with great effort.

“Well you’ve run off our chef,” he says as he rolls his eyes dramatically. “Do you intend us to starve or is there something you wanted to say?”

Lucas doesn’t know where to start. His mouth opens and words just start stumbling out. “I’m sorry, Mika. For what I said before. It was fucked up and I…I fucked up. I get it now.”

“You get it… _now_?” Mike replies carefully. “And what exactly do you get, Lucas?” 

“That people should just be who they are and never have to apologize for it. Who you are and who I am… we aren’t that a like, but we still have a lot of the same experiences. And I’m grateful I have someone like you to talk to about it.”

“Someone like me?” Mika questions. “A fag you mean?”

“No,” Lucas shakes his head quickly. “I mean, before…yeah. That’s kind of what I…” He pauses, looks down at his quickly cooling coffee cup. “I was wrong. I didn’t understand what it meant to be…to be _this_.”

“Can you really not even say the word, Lucas?” Mika asks, and not unkindly. When Lucas looks at him, Mika appears genuinely concerned. Silence falls; it feels eternal but may only last a few seconds. There’s shame inside of it, and not because of _who_ Lucas is, but because of his inability to accept it. He doesn’t want to be that person. He wants to be as proud as Mika is.

“Gay,” he says after a deep breath. “I didn’t understand what it meant to be gay. I just know my own experience so far and that’s not going to be that same for everyone else. So…thank you for helping me understand that.”

Mike stares at Lucas for a long moment, a moment where Lucas fears he’s said all the wrong things again, but then Mika nods. He places his coffee on the counter and plucks Lucas’ out of his hand and places it beside his. The next thing Lucas knows, he has Mika’s arms wrapped around him in a squeezing hug. Mika jumps up and down as he cradles Lucas’ stiff frame to his body.

“Welcome to the family, Lucas!” he tells him excitedly, still jumping and squeezing the life out of him. Lucas lets it happen. He rolls his eyes affectionately, but stays still until Mika is through with his grand display. When he steps back, Mika makes a face and then starts to sniff around Lucas’ shirt. “You’ll give us all a bad name if you continue to smell like that, though.”

Lucas groans and rolls his eyes again. He picks up his coffee cup and sips it as he tries to make his escape.

“Not so fast Grasshopper!” Mike exclaims, pulling Lucas back by his shirt. “Just because you smell like boy farts doesn’t mean I’m through with you.”

Lucas raises his eyebrows expectantly as he drains more of his coffee.

“Have you seen more of Eliott?” Mika asks, batting his eyelashes. Lucas prays he doesn’t pretend to give the coffee cup a blowjob. When he doesn’t, and just waits patiently for Lucas to respond, Lucas rewards him.

“No, not really,” he says carefully. “But things are weird there.”

“Weird?”

“Yeah,” Lucas nods. “We…had a thing, you know, and he said all these things to me…” Lucas trails off, looks down at his coffee cup again. The black is like a blanket to hide under.

“What kinds of things?” Mika asks, scandalized.

“Not _those_ kinds of things, just… nice things. Things that made me think he really liked me. Then he says he’s left his girlfriend for me, but then the next day he’s saying things are going too fast, and then I see him kissing his girlfriend at a party.” Lucas sighs, meets Mika’s eye only when he’s no longer afraid to see his expression. Mika looks contemplative, and maybe a little concerned. “Then yesterday he leaves a note in my pocket, messing with my head again. I don’t know what to think.”

Mika takes in a deep breath, crosses the arm not attached to the coffee cup over his chest. “This girlfriend, have they been together awhile?”

Luca nods. “Yeah, I don’t know how long but…a while.” Mika nods. He doesn’t look hopeful. “That’s…bad?”

“Listen, I won’t sugarcoat it for you, Sweetheart. Baby gays need to hear the truth. Your heart’s going to break one way or another, and it’s easier if you see it coming.”

Lucas definitely does not like where this is going. “Okay…”

“I know a lot of guys who have girlfriends but sleep with men.” Mika pauses. He looks genuinely regretful for what he’s about to say. “But I don’t know very many guys who actually leave their girlfriends for another guy.” When Lucas’ dejected expression fills the room, Mika continues. “I could be wrong, you never know. Stranger things have happened. But I’d…I’d be careful if I were you, Lucas.” He gives Lucas a sad smile and leans towards him, placing his hand on Lucas shoulder. “Protect your baby gay heart.”

He pats Lucas a couple times on his shoulder, then leaves the kitchen yelling, “Manon! Crêpes! Oh my God, I’m wasting away over here!”

Lucas leans against the counter, thinking over Mika’s advice until he can wrap his head around it. He lets out a deep sigh then heads back into the living room, placing his coffee cup on the table and falling onto the couch. When he reaches for his phone, it’s out of habit. He knows better than to expect a response from Eliott.

Still, the lack of response drives another stake through his heart. Lucas doesn’t know how he let himself get in this position, how he allowed himself to fall for someone so unavailable, but he’s in the thick of it now. This game Eliott is playing with him is frustrating, but it’s the same game 

Eliott has always played. He’s always challenging Lucas to make a move, but right now it feels like he’s challenging Lucas to save Eliott from himself.

Lucas slouches further into the couch and closes his eyes.

If Lucas can find the courage to fight for Eliott, then the least Eliott can do is find the courage to respond.


	3. Mardi 13:11

Lucas and Imane enter the common room together, bickering about the biology project they were assigned. 

“I honestly don’t even know how you fit your head through the door,” Lucas tells her. “Your ego-“

“ _My_ ego?” Imane shoots back. “You’re the one incapable of admitting that I might just know more than you about this!”

“Woah there, you two,” Alex interrupts from her place on the couch, side-eyeing them as she texts on her phone. “Safe space.”

Lucas and Imane roll their eyes simultaneously. “Okay,” she says, turning to him. “We split the project into two parts. I do the first part, and you can’t change anything, and then you can finish it. Okay?”

Lucas considers that for just a moment then shrugs. “Fine. Okay.”

“Okay,” Imane repeats. She turns back to Alex. “Where’s Daphné? She asked us to meet her here.”

“I don’t know,” she replies. “I’ve been dealing with a stupid horny boy all day.”

“Still with the threesomes?” Imane asks her, taking a seat beside Alex on the couch as Lucas pulls up a chair. 

Alex rolls her eyes. “I think I’ll have to cut him loose.”

Lucas nods as Imane agrees. “Sorry,” she says, but Alex just shrugs.

The common room door opens and Daphné and Emma stroll through it. They’re mid-discussion, something light and playful that makes Lucas feel warm. Being with the girls almost always makes Lucas feel safe. He hasn’t talked to Arthur or Basille about Eliott yet, but they’ve probably heard a few things by now.

Lucas endured a few rude comments in the courtyard the day before, and more stares than he is used to, but Yann was by his side the next second, making everything a little easier to withstand. Being with the girls is like that too. He hasn’t come out to them, but he isn’t sure he’ll need to. Lucas imagines he’ll just be able to drop Eliott into the conversation one day and the girls will just pick it up and move on. He might have to deal with a few comments about how hot Eliott is, but Lucas doesn’t worry about being hurt here.

“Lucas,” Daphné says as he sits at the table. “Is it true?”

Lucas only half hears her, his mind suddenly on Eliott and how he still hasn’t responded to his text. 

“Hmm?” he replies, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

“The whole school is talking about it,” she says with a smile. “If it’s not true then, I’m sorry, but-“

“Daphy, what are you saying?” Lucas asks, confused but also very aware of where this may be going. He looks at Emma, who only looks apologetic in return. 

“That you’re gay,” Daphné says with a wide smile. “Is it true?”

Lucas feels like he’s been punched in the gut. It’s not that he hadn’t planned on coming out to the girls, it’s just...

It was taken away from him. Again. Lucas can’t find the words to respond.

“Daphné!” Alex cries, standing up from the couch and coming to stand beside Lucas. “You can’t just ask people if they’re gay!”

“What?” Daphné replies, genuinely chastened. “I love gay people.”

Imane rolls her eyes and comes to sit beside Emma at the table. “You don’t just announce something like that to a room full of people, either.”

Daphné’s mouth is open, her eyes traveling quickly between her friends. Emma shakes her head softly.

“What I…I didn’t mean anything by it.” Daphné reaches out across the table towards Lucas, but his hands are still in his pockets, his stomach still in his throat. “I’m sorry if it’s not true, or if it is and I…I just didn’t know if you heard.”

“I heard,” he replies quietly. Lucas isn’t sure how he’s found his voice. “It’s not an easy thing to ignore.”

“So…” Daphné prompts, but Alex waves her hand at her, clearly irritated 

“No!” she tells her quickly. “You don’t get to ask again!”

Daphné clamps her mouth shut, but her eyes are still wide. Lucas feels like he has to say something now, but he really doesn’t want to. He wasn’t planning on another emotional coming out speech today. Each of the girls are eyeing him warily. Lucas doesn’t know what to do, so leaving feels like the best option. 

Just when he’s about to stand up, Alex sits down beside him with a loud sigh. “So, can we talk about me breaking up with Romain? Because I just can’t decide if it’s the right thing to do.”

Everyone seemed to be holding their breath until that moment, but with Alex’s confession, the room breathes again. Emma starts peppering Alex with questions about her decision, and Imane turns to Lucas and frowns.

“And don’t take a completely different position in your half of the project,” she tells him harshly. “It won’t turn out well if you just go about your own thing.”

Lucas nods quickly, so grateful for her and Alex he would probably agree to anything right now. He can feel Daphné’s eyes on him, but they aren’t heavy. Lucas is safe here.

When Manon enters a few moments later, she joins the conversation easily. It flows until Lucas stands up to leave fifteen minutes later. He’s supposed to meet Yann at the skate park. The girls bid him goodbye, and Lucas feels like he’s dodged a bullet. It’s not that he doesn’t trust the girls with the truth, he just really doesn’t want to get into it today, especially since everything with Eliott is still so up in the air.

He leaves the common room just as relaxed as he entered it, not completely at peace, but far more than he’s been recently. When the common room door opens again a moment later, Lucas stops in the hallway and turns around. Alex is standing in the doorway, smiling. She doesn’t say anything, but Lucas can see essays in her eyes. 

Alex walks towards him confidently and pulls Lucas into a hug. He’s been hugged more in the last three days than he has for the last year, he thinks. He’s starting to get used to it. Lucas lets himself be hugged by Alex, and even returns it for a moment before Alex pulls away. She still doesn’t say anything. She just smiles up at him and then turns back around and disappears back into the common room.

Lucas allows himself a tiny grin. He could definitely get used to this.


	4. Mercredi 12:05

Lucas and Yann walk towards their friends in the courtyard, Lucas dreading the upcoming interaction and Yann silently encouraging him forward. Lucas hasn’t spoken to Arthur or Basile since their fight, and he knows he owes them apologies. He just wasn’t ready to explain himself until now.

He approaches them cautiously, catching on to a rude comment about Daphné that gets under Lucas’ skin, but he pushes it aside. Now isn’t the time to get into another fight.

Basile sees him first and immediately smiles and raises up a hand for a high-five, but Arthur pushes it down again. Basile looks awkwardly between them until Lucas is standing next to Arthur. Yann hangs back slightly, ready to intervene if this goes south, but giving Lucas the space to work it out on his own.

“Hey guys,” he says quietly, and Basile smiles again. 

“Hey Lucas!” He replies happily. “Did you hear that rumor-“

“I uh,” Lucas cuts him off, eyes on Arthur now. He has tape keeping his lenses together. “I wanted to apologize for the way I acted at the party. I was…out of my head. A lot going on, and I freaked.”

Arthur nods. “Yeah, I’d say that’s accurate.” He doesn’t want to let this go as easily as Lucas had hoped.

“I’m sorry about your glasses,” Lucas tells him. “I’ll buy you a new pair.” Arthur nods again, his lips pinched together in a way that makes his cheekbones even sharper. “To make up for it, you guys can come over to mine on Friday, and we’ll drink Mika out of all of his alcohol.”

Basile smiles brightly. “Okay! All better, yeah?” He eyes Arthur, who only shrugs. “Now can we talk about how everyone is saying Lucas is gay?”

“Huh?” Arthur replies, eyes narrowed.

“Yeah, everyone is saying you fought because Lucas is gay,” Basile says with a laugh. “It’s that hilarious?”

“Why would we fight about that?” Arthur asks, and Lucas is so surprised by the question, it gives him a reprieve from Basile’s comment.

“I don’t know,” Basile replies with a shrug. “Because you’re a homophobe?”

“I’m not a homophobe!” Arthur replies dramatically. “Me?” He points to himself, his eyes wide. “That’s insane.” Basile and Yann stare at Arthur as he shakes his head in disbelief, but Lucas feels like there’s more to Arthur’s refusal.

“Okay well,” Basile says again. “The rumor is super funny, though, right?” He’s looking at Lucas then, and Lucas’ eyes go wide. He knows he has to tell them, and this is the moment where it’s going to happen, but still, he’s terrified. His gaze falls to Yann, who silently encourages him once more.

“Uh,” he mumbles. “No, actually. Not that funny.”

“Well, you know what I mean,” Basile replies, pulling his phone from his pocket and checking an incoming message. Lucas wants to slap some sense into him. He sighs heavily.

“No, I mean, it’s not funny because it’s true.” Lucas says all in one breath. It comes out like a gust of wind, forceful and daring anyone to stand in its way.

He looks between his friends and waits for their reaction. Basile continues to stare down at his phone for a few seconds, but it only takes Lucas a moment to realize his friend’s not blinking. He looks up at Lucas slowly, his eyes going from him to Yann in a slow pattern.

Arthur still looks like someone pissed in his cereal, but his expression has softened somewhat. He doesn’t look confused, but perhaps a little surprised.

Lucas sighs. “You remember that guy who returned Yann’s scarf a couple weeks ago? The new guy, Eliott?” Basile nods reluctantly, still completely confused, but Arthur seems to already understand. “We’ve…uh…had a thing.”

“A thing?” Arthur repeats incredulously.

“Yeah,” Lucas says more confidently. “A thing.”

“So you’re…what? Gay now?” Basile asks, completely flabbergasted.

“You don’t just turn gay, Baz,” Yann steps in.

“Yeah, I know but…it’s Lucas!” Basile cries. “He’s hooking up with girls all the time!” Lucas just shrugs. “I guess that’s good for us, huh?”

Arthur laughs. “It’s not like Lucas being gay means you’ll be hooking up with more girls.”

“Whatever guys,” Yann interrupts again. “Lucas said we can do drinks at his place Friday. We good?”

Basile is smiling again, is hand up for the high-five Arthur had refused him earlier. Lucas indulges him. “I’m in,” he says. “But maybe we could invite the girls?”

Yann sighs, rolling his eyes until they land on Arthur. Arthur is still looking at Lucas carefully, and Lucas really doesn’t know what to expect. After a moment, Arthur nods. “Yeah alright. But I want a new pair of glasses.”

Lucas smiles. “Easy. No problem.” They shake hands and Lucas feels another weight lift from his shoulders.

Things are falling back into place. He’s repaired his relationships with his friends, and he’s opened up to them. He doesn’t have to hide anymore. Lucas can finally breathe.

It’s just a shame every time he breathes he thinks of Eliott.


	5. Jeudi 9:48

Lucas is pulling his Biology book out of his backpack when he finds another note from Eliott. Imane looks at it curiously, but averts her eyes once she realizes who it’s from. 

The note is broken into two scenes again. 

The first scene is of the Hedgehog saying ‘Mercí’ to the Raccoon, but the Raccoon is too busy building a brick wall in front of himself to notice. The second scene also shows the Hedgehog thanking the Raccoon, but in this scene the Raccoon is holding the Hedgehog’s hand. They’re smiling at one another, and there are hearts floating above them.

Lucas stares down at the drawing a few moments, blinking through the complicated emotions his heart stirs, then lets out a deep sigh. It’s the kind of exhale that comes from one’s bones. He’s just so very tired of this now. Shaking his head, Lucas stuffs the note into his bag and returns his attention back to his biology textbook. 

Imane waits until he is sufficiently distracted before she interrupts his thoughts. 

“I, um,” she pauses when Lucas looks at her, hesitating, and then scoffing dramatically and rolling her eyes. “Not that I’m eager to admit this, but it appears I was wrong about what I said before.”

“About what?”

“About there being no evolutionary need for homosexuality. I was reading a really interesting article that said homosexuality has played a pretty crucial role in evolution, actually. I can send you a link.”

Lucas’ smile is quiet, private, but its’ there. He knows what Imane is doing, and he’s grateful.

“Okay,” he tells her. “Thanks.”

She nods reluctantly, as if she were actually put out about having to admit she was wrong, and then goes back to her work. Lucas decides to push his luck.

“And Islam? Any evolving thoughts there?”

Imane stops her work and stares down at her notebook for a few moments before sighing and turning back to Lucas.

“Islam says what it always does, Lucas. We aren’t to judge anyone, and all men deserve respect and peace. If anyone tells you different, just know that isn’t coming from Islam. That’s coming from fear.”

Lucas listens attentively and nods in acceptance when Imane is finished. “Okay,” he tells her again, a tiny grin on his face. 

Lucas turns back to his work and waits for class to start. He tries not to think about Eliott and his drawing, but it eats at him. Lucas isn’t interested in getting any more drawings. Not if it just means Eliott continues to be with Lucille. He doesn’t want to be strung along like this, but he doesn’t know what to do about it.

When his phone vibrates on the table, Lucas’ heart jumps in his throat. He wonders how many times he has to receive a message from everyone but Eliott before that stops happening.

 _ **Yann:** Daphné said you were supposed to paint the foyer with Eliott_  
_**Yann:** How about me and the boys help you instead?_  
_**Yann:** Forget this dude. He obviously doesn’t know what’s good for him._

Lucas smiles as his teacher enters the room and he’s forced to hide his phone again. He’s not alone in this anymore. He has his boys, he has the girls. Whatever is going on with Eliott, Lucas knows they’ve got his back.


	6. Jeudi 14:25

Basile shrieks as Arthur flings white paint at him. Yann and Lucas grin at each other and try to avoid the splatter. They’re painting over the graffiti art in the common room, starting with a white blank slate. Lucas and Yann each have a roller, while Basile and Arthur work on the trim. Or periodically throw paint at each other. 

Lucas can’t stop smiling. 

“Anything new with your boy?” Arthur asks him as he wipes paint from his glasses. “Pretty shitty of him to bail on painting the common room.”

Lucas shrugs as he rolls paint onto the wall. “Not really. He gave me another drawing.”

“Drawing?” Basile asks with interest, but Yann is clicking his tongue and shaking his head.

“This dude, man,” he says as he keeps painting. “I don’t get him. Why is he sending you notes and stuff if he’s still with his girl?”

Lucas shrugs again. “I don’t know. I don’t understand shit with him.”

“He’s got you on the hook,” Arthur says in a flourish. “You know? How girls will keep a guy as a back up just in case it doesn’t work out with the one she’s got now?”

Yann scoffs. “Girls don’t do that.”

“Girls do that?” Basile asks at the same time.

Lucas just stares at all of them. “Well I don’t want to be on his hook. I don’t want to be on anybody’s fucking hook.” 

“You’ve got to shut this shit down then,” Yann tells him. “Once and for all.”

“But…I mean…” Lucas sighs, looks up at the blank wall. “I still… you know.”

“You still want to be with him?” Arthur supplies. Lucas just sighs again. Shrugs. “Well, you’ve got to give him an ultimatum then. Make him choose.”

“How can I _make_ him choose? It seems like he already has.”

“But he’s still sending you notes,” Basile reminds him. “Doesn’t seem like he really has chosen.”

Yann nods. “You’ve got to tell him something like…Stop sending me notes if you’re just going to go back to your girlfriend.”

Lucas looks between his friends, contemplates what they’re suggesting. It feels like good advice. He wipes his hands on the drop cloth, pulls his phone out of his pocket, and opens his text exchange with Eliott.

**_Lucas:_ ** _These drawings don’t mean anything if you’re just going to stay with her._

He doesn’t think before sending the message. He cares for Eliott, wants to be with him, but he’s done feeling like this. Either Eliott wants him or he doesn’t. Lucas just wants it to be done.

He looks up proudly to his friends, gets ready to tell them what he sent, when his phone vibrates in his hand.

**_Eliott:_ ** _Where are you? Can we meet?_

Lucas mouth drops open, his eyes darting immediately to Yann. 

“I told him that his drawings don’t mean anything if he’s just going to stay with his girlfriend and then he texted back ‘Where are you? Can we meet?’…What should I say?”

Arthur and Basile turn towards each other, their smiles wide and excited. Yann’s eyebrows rise dramatically when he responds, “Tell him where you are.”

Lucas nods, swallows back his nerves and starts typing.

**_Lucas:_ ** _Painting the common room with the boys_

Lucas looks up at Yann. “Should I ask him to meet me here?”

Yann shakes his head. “No, no, no. You don’t want to seem desperate. Just tell him you’re here, and if he wants to talk to you he’ll come.”

Lucas nods in understanding. “Should I ask him why he wants to meet?”

“No, dude!” Yann replies in frustration. “Have you turned into Baz? Desperation level 100?” Lucas shakes his head dramatically. “Just tell him where you are, that’s it. Balls in his court.”

Lucas nods again and presses send. He stares at his phone, willing it to do something other than exist in his hand. The boys wait with him, all eyes on the phone. When it doesn’t vibrate for a few moments, Lucas pockets it.

“He’s not going to respond. It’s just the way he is.”

The boys accept this quietly, giving Lucas looks of encouragement before returning to their task. The conversation devolves into Basile’s love for Daphné very quickly, and Lucas finds himself distracted from his drama with Eliott. It isn’t until the common room door opens five minutes later that Lucas remembers what it feels like to not be able to breathe.

Eliott looks desperate, his chest heaving as if he ran all the way there. His eyes flit between Lucas and his friends, suddenly unsure of his next move. Lucas and his friends are all frozen, bewildered.

“I…” Eliott starts, taking a few more steps into the room. “Can we talk?”

Lucas, with his boys right beside him, feels a lot more confident in this moment than he would have before. Looking at Eliott is difficult, not just because he’s so beautiful and Lucas misses the feel of his skin, but because Lucas is also genuinely angry with him. 

“Who are you wanting to talk to?” Lucas asks shortly. “It’s pretty hard to tell sometimes.”

Eliott lets out an uncomfortable, but incredibly sad laugh. He looks down at his shoes. “I guess I deserve that.” Lucas doesn’t reply. He hates how sad Eliott looks. “I just…I know things have been hard for you, and I know I’m not helping.”

Lucas nods, “Yeah, things have been pretty terrible. But I’ve got my friends.” Lucas shrugs. “I got my shit figured out. How about you?”

Eliott looks between Yann, Basile, and Arthur, all of whom look just as desperate for Eliott’s answer as Lucas. It’s obvious when Eliott realizes that Lucas has told them about Eliott, and it looks like a weight lifts from his shoulders.

“It’s complicated,” Eliott replies quietly. “But-“

Lucas shakes his head. “I get that it isn’t easy, but it doesn’t have to be complicated. It’s a choice. Your choice. But I’m not going to sit around and wait for you to make it anymore.”

With that, Lucas turns around, picks up his roller, and starts painting the wall again. Its several moments of silence, but then his friends are doing the same, and the common room door opens and closes. Lucas doesn’t have to turn around to know that Eliott has left. 

And a piece of his heart leaves with him.


	7. Vendredi 8:52

“Lucas!” Daphné shouts across the courtyard, all heads turning in her direction as she races towards him. 

He stops his progression towards the school’s entrance and waits for Daphné to reach him.

“Lucas!” she says again, and he can tell she is not happy. “What did you do to the common room wall? Is this what you think is cool?”

“What? Daphy-“

“I mean, its romantic, yes, but you really shouldn’t be using our common room for your grand gestures. We’ll have to paint over it.”

Lucas frowns at her, completely confused, until it hits him. 

And then his feet are moving before his mind tells them to. He runs to the common room, pulls open the door, and finds the rest of the girls staring up at what was once a blank wall and is now a cry into the void.

The scene is dark, painted midnight-blue and covered in water droplets. Rain or tears, Lucas doesn’t know. What he does know, is that the quote painted in elegant script in the center speaks directly to his heart.

_**“Nothing is so strange when one is in love … as the complete indifference of other people.”** _

Lucas steps forward slowly, his heart in his throat, his stomach twisting. It feels like all the breath in his lungs has been ripped away and replaced with cold steel. 

Love? Lucas didn’t know that’s what this was for Eliott. He knew _he_ was in love; he knew it the moment Eliott left him that morning. Many would say they knew they were in love at the first kiss, or the first time they spoke of something real, but Lucas knows better. An emotion expands as time progresses, and love is felt most acutely once it’s lost. 

“Lucas?” Manon questions quietly. She’s standing beside him now, breathing the same air he’s yet to take in. “Is this from him?”

Lucas swallows, finally inhales. He can’t speak. 

“From him?” Daphné asks from behind him. “Eliott?”

Lucas doesn’t know if someone confirms this. He doesn’t know anything at the moment.

His feet bring him closer to the wall, while the girls part like the red sea to give him space. Once closer, he can see something else written on the wall. It’s small, written in black and so subtle most people would miss it. However, there’s a tiny red heart that pulls Lucas’ attention. Beside it, written more plainly than the larger quote, is another message.

_**Please forgive me.** _

Lucas has cried more recently than he’s ever cried in his entire life, but somehow his body is still able to produce tears. They collect around his lashes, fall reluctantly. There’s a hand on his shoulder, another weaving with his own. Lucas can only keep staring at the wall. 

“What will you do?” Alex asks, but Lucas has no answer for her. He can’t think clearly, right now.

Right now, all he can do is breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The quote is Virginia Woolf. Of course. 
> 
> What do you think will happen next??? :)


	8. Vendredi 14:38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning, rating goes up at the end of this chapter. Wink wink, nudge nudge.

Lucas waited for Eliott after every class, tried to find him in the hallways, and even asked Alex if he’d seen him again, but the older boy just shook his head.

“He wasn’t in class today,” Alex tells him, and Lucas is painfully aware of how often Eliott skips school.

He really doesn’t want to do this over text message. He wants to look in Eliott’s eyes when they talk about the mural and what it means, but he just wants to understand now.

_**Lucas:** And Lucille? I saw you kissing her last weekend. Can you love two people at once?”_

Eliott’s response is immediate, as if his phone’s already in his hand, waiting for Lucas to reach out to him.

_**Eliott:** Yes, but it’s not the same kind of love._

Lucas stares down at his phone, the buzz from the school’s courtyard fading to nothing around him.

_**Lucas:** I don’t know what that means._  
_**Eliott:** Let me explain it to you in person._

Lucas groans in frustration. Suddenly, now that they’re talking about it, Lucas isn’t ready to see Eliott yet, not when his hopes are so high and his heart is so close to shattering again. He doesn’t want to see Eliott just for it all to mean nothing.

_**Lucas:** Just tell me now._

He has to wait several moments before his phone vibrates again. He spends this time clenching his jaw and trying to breathe evenly.

_**Eliott:** I’m sorry you saw me kissing Lucille. I’m sorry I hurt you. I was scared and she’s all I’ve ever known. But Lucille is not my destiny, she’s my safety net. I ended things between us. I chose the wrong path. It should have always been you._

Lucas lets out a quiet sound of exhilarated relief. He’s smiling now, wide and without abandon.

_**Lucas:** Where are you?_  
_**Eliott:** Home. Will you come?_  
_**Lucas:** On my way._

Lucas pockets his phone and runs to the bus stop. He waits impatiently, triple checking the arrival times, and bouncing his knee up and down until an elderly gentleman glares at him. Lucas doesn’t care. He’s too excited, too happy.

When the bus finally arrives, Lucas rushes onto it, as if it’ll get to Eliott’s house any faster. He spends the ride re-reading Eliott’s texts and staring at the photo he took of Eliott’s painting. He tries to slow his heart rate, tries not to look like a love-sick foot, but he doesn’t think he’s successful. 

He rushes off the bus again when it arrives to Eliott’s stop, and runs straight to his building. A woman is holding the door open for her young daughter, so Lucas squeezes in behind her, throwing an apology at her shouts of protest. He takes the stairs two at a time, only feeling the full force of his nerves when he’s standing at Eliott’s door. 

He takes a deep breath then knocks three times. Anticipation pools in his chest, but it doesn’t weigh him down. Lucas feels light, like he could fly away at any moment. 

There are footsteps behind the door, and Lucas feels his stomach jump back up into his throat, but then Eliott is opening the door, standing there with eyes shining like the sun. He takes in Lucas’ presence, gaze hungry and ready to take whatever Lucas gives him.

Lucas doesn’t think. He just steps into Eliott’s body, lifts his hand to Eliott’s face, and crushes their lips together. It’s desperate, like the first drink of water after a hot summer day, and Eliott responds immediately. He kicks the door closed as his hands reach up to cup Lucas’ face. He kisses Lucas back with passionate freedom, their lips sliding together in a fierce dance. There’s no smiling during this kiss; no happy laughs or celebration. There’s too much desperation, too much desire.

Lucas crowds Eliott back against the door, gripping his hips and kissing him like he’s never kissed anyone before. It’s a kiss that’s going somewhere, a promise of more to come. Eliott kisses him deeply in return, his tongue soft but unyielding. He pushes against Lucas’ hips and starts to guide them backwards, breaking the kiss to look in Lucas’ eyes. There’s a question in his gaze, a request for permission, but Lucas can’t do anything but nod as he pulls them into another deep kiss. He can’t stop. Any moment not spent with Eliott’s lips on his is a moment wasted.

Eliott continues to walk them backward until Lucas feels the couch at his knees. And then he’s on his back, Eliott above him, kissing him like it means something, like _they_ mean something. And they do, Lucas knows this. Him and Eliott are like two comets passing in the night, colliding and creating meteors across the sky. They’re heaven and Earth and everything in between. 

Eliott’s hands wander down his body, touching him, loving him, and Lucas can only close his eyes and pray it never stops. His shirt is gone a moment later, and Eliott’s is quick to follow. Their shirts settle together on the floor, black and white tangled together like two ships in the night. Skin on skin, Lucas is melting. Eliott’s mouth is on his chest, his navel, his hips, with no signs of stopping. When his jeans are unzipped, and Eliott is rising up to take them off properly, Lucas reaches for Eliott’s pants too. He doesn’t want anything between them. 

And then nothing is, and Eliott is still above him, moving with him, making sounds Lucas has only dreamed about. His fingers dig into Eliott’s skin, his mouth answers every kiss with absolute certainty. He’s never been more sure of anything, than of how much he loves the man completely wrecking him in this moment. 

But then he’s forced to re-evaluate that when Eliott’s mouth moves down his body again, his eyes locked with Lucas' as Lucas watches him descend. It’s the most erotic moment of Lucas’ life, one he wishes he could paint across the world. This is what they are too. They are love and they are desire. They are patience and they are hope.

And when Eliott finally takes Lucas into his mouth, Lucas sees everything that they are behind his eyes as they roll back in pleasure. He sees frantic nights doing exactly this and lazy Saturday mornings doing nothing at all. As Lucas’ hand threads through Eliott’s hair, he sees artistry in the scene before him, and a piece of his soul settles. 

This is what they are, and what Lucas and Eliott are is beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think! Comments are the motivation to write Week Eight!


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